New to forum, please advise

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Neil Toomb, Sep 29, 2016.

  1. Neil Toomb

    Neil Toomb Newbie

    Hi, I am so glad there is a forum like this. I recently found out about the WWII widow pension that my mom is eligible for and have begun the application. As background, my mom lives in a bungalow that I rent for her and myself (I live 50 miles away) and an aide split time caring for her needs of medication, bathing, shopping, cooking, household chores, etc. My moms total worth is $12,000 (her burial fund) and she gets $1500 per month of social security and a $56 per month pension. The money doesn't last and for years I have been supplementing her living costs. It is unfortunate I just found out about this cause my dad, a WWII vet died 30 years ago. My question is how do I show I am exhausting her monthly money since I pay the aide in cash (she prefers it) and since I am running low on personal funds, I now take money monthly from mom to care for her such as gas, tolls, medicine, disposable diapers, etc. is it enough just to have the bank statement showing the withdrawals and the aide and attendant forms showing the payments?

    I also have been waiting 3 months for a copy of my dads discharge papers, is this normal?

    thank you so much....
  2. Kaylin

    Kaylin Hero Member Staff Member

    I'm glad you found the VeteranAid website and are utilizing the forums. Happy to help if we can!
    First of all, you really do need to be paying the caregiver for your mom in checks. That's the best way to show that she is paying for care because it will be easy to see on bank statements. If you have to find another caregiver in order to pay them in checks, you might consider that. But yes, bank statements are what you show in support of how much your mother is receiving per month in total income and how much she is spending in care costs.

    Waiting 3 months for discharge papers does seem a bit long. You might want to call whatever organization you used to get the papers and ask them on the status. I would.
  3. Neil Toomb

    Neil Toomb Newbie

    Hi Kaylin, thanks for your reply.
    I guess I will have to find a new aide though the ones on the books are much more expensive. Can you tell me how I can get reimbursed for my expenses as her part time caregiver. I left my full time job to go part time so I can help more with mom and I basically go in to stay with her 3-4 days per week, my wife who is an RN helps the other days and we have friends pitch in. But financially it is difficult. Being 50 miles away it cost us a lot per month to go in when we pay the gas and tolls. Also my moms SS check of $1600 per month doesn't even cover her rent, utilities, food etc. For the past several years I have been paying for everything from handrail and bathroom upgrades, cases and cases of Depends, her medicare supplemental insurance, and every other financial needs for personal care. I even have to supplement her food and phone, etc.

    with going part time so I can care for her I don't know how I am going to make ends meet, please advise....

    thank you, Neil
  4. Kaylin

    Kaylin Hero Member Staff Member

    Sure, you can always have your mother pay you X amount per month for care as well - and that shows she needs the benefit and would qualify. Then she would just pay you X amount from her A&A award money if that's the best thing for the both of you. You can include the Depends on the A&A application as a care expense, some people have done that in the past. Can't hurt. I hope that helps? Unfortunately it's a bad situation when an applicant is already stretched for money and they have to wait on the A&A benefit. If she is struggling financially - you can always state that on the Statement in Support of Claim form 21-4138 to ask for expediency in the application being processed.

    Something along the lines of:
    "My mother, the applicant, is being financially drained of all of her income currently. Please expedite the application processing. Refer to bank statements and income and expenses stated on the 21-534EZ."

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