I searched through the forum but I didn't see a scenario that fits the one for my parents. In July we received notice that Aid and Attendance were awarded to both my mother and father (both WWII vets, both in assisted living getting Level 1 medical care). They were awarded the maximum amount thanks to all the information I was able to glean from this website! On the last day of December, I received a letter saying that my mother had been declared not competent (she has dementia) and a fiduciary will need to be appointed. I'm not surprised by this, as I had read that any indication of dementia on the doctor's report would trigger this. Everything I've read here, though, suggests that I should pursue this vigorously so that they will release the back benefits. Here's the thing -- they deposited the lump sum into my parents' account in July! That money has long ago been spent (payment to the ALF). Obviously, I didn't realize I was going to have to keep records, and I certainly didn't know that the money needed to be in a separate account (and couldn't have set it up anyway, since no one was approved as fiduciary). I would rather NOT have to do anything differently than we are already doing, so I'm happy dragging this out as long as possible. Should I go ahead and send in the 21-4138 saying we have no objection to the fiduciary process, or can I just wait and let them "catch up" down the road? All of the VA funds are being used for the ALF, so I have no issue with where the money is going. Another concern for me is the interview. My mom has been extremely agitated about having to go to ALF, and has made life perfectly miserable for my father. We have *finally* gotten her meds adjusted and she seems somewhat more content; however, if you mention anything about her "disability" she gets very irate. The thought of an interviewer telling her that she was not competent to handle her financial affairs (which she isn't, and she doesn't) throws me into a panic attack. Not only that, but she has no idea how much they are paying to live there, and if she did she would pack her bags and move back into her house (or at least try). And she just might tell the interviewer that she is rich and doesn't need the VA money! If you don't know her, she can sound perfectly lucid! Any suggestions before I give myself an ulcer over this?