my mother was approved for aid & attendance as a parent

[goldie54]

My brother who was a Vietnam veteran died Dec 2006. He never married and no children. My mother was his dependent.  I applied for Aid & Attendance for my mother who is legally blind and now in stage 4 of Alz.  After several months of letters back & forth she was approved for the A&A benefit.  She receives $602 Soc. Sec. and her VA benefit is $362 for A&A.  I am her only caregiver and I need to get help for caregiving.  I have checked with Home Health care, they want 15-20$ hrly.  AL is 2500 monthy and the nursing home cost is outrageous. 
I went to the VA to see if Mom should be getting more for the A&A since she now requires 24 hrs caregiving.  I was told by the case mgr.this is the maximum amount ($362)for her since she receives Soc. Sec.  I am going bankrupt trying to keep my brother's mortage (no mortgage insurance ,Mom lived with him) her medical care, depends and etc.
I guess my question is I thought if she goes in the NH the A&A would pay more for needing the assisted living in daily activties.  $362 will not even pay for Home Health Aide for a month. 
Does anyone know anything on this subject?

[bigmuny]

Godie54..
Can you tell me what form you used to apply for AA for your Mother??  My mother is claimed as a dependent on my disability in which I receive AA but she has cancer now and could sure use the extra money..I didn't know a parent could apply for AA unless her spouse was a veteran..since she is my mother I would like to know the form you used please...thanks and really hope things work out for all of you...

[vetadmin]

Goldie,

Was your mom married to a veteran as well being the dependent of your brother?

[vetadmin]

Goldie,

We offer the following for some additional insights to your situation:

A. It looks like you did not deduct any of your mom's medical expenses so she is just getting the A&A adder without any of the dependant pension amount.  You should fill out the Medical expense form. - If you did not apply long ago, you could write in a Support of Claim that you mistakenly left off the medical expenses in the original application and would appreciate them being included from the beginning of the claim but in no way should that delay the prospective adjustment of the award as your mother is in danger of losing her home.  $60 per month for depends is a given - if you have receipts you can claim higher but often $60 per month is easier.

B. In tandem with A above, you should contact Elder Services to see if they will provide free or reduced home care help - this is a state and federally funded program which varies by state, but your mother should qualify for some free services. In Massachusetts they can get a lot of free services.  Even if its just 3 hours a week, you can then use the Case manage for oversight and deduct her caregiving costs (see C below) -

Also depending on the state, if your mother is Assisted Living Eligible, she may qualify for Medicaid which will take her monthly income (sometimes excluding A&A) and then they pay for the rest of AL. 

C. Once A is resolved, if there is any money on the table - you can deduct costs of your providing care for your mother as long as she is a medical professional or overseen by a medical professional. I would find out what Home care agencies PAY (not charge) and use that amount without being greedy or stupid in anyway, because they will investigate - and then give her a discount because she is her mother.

D. Reverse mortgage if the house is in your mother's name although I think these are tough to come by right now.

[vetadmin]

Goldie and Restess,

This issue is not clear cut as it is confusing. People are getting “compensation benefits” and “pension benefits” intertwined.  They are two different things
Check out this link for some additional information with Q&A’s that may be better to properly address this for you.
 http://www.veterans.state.ny.us/vets_dependent_parent.html  This should give you a better overview.

I would also suggest that you seek local assistance where all the paperwork can be reviewed and the benefit better explained.

[goldie54]

vetadmin Thank you for your reply. Sorry, for the tardiness of this reply.
No, my mother wasn't married to a veteran. She was the dependent of my brother who never married and no children. My Mom was his dependent.
Ok what I understand you saying is I didn't put any medical expenses in when I applied for the A&A.  She was awarded around 9/07.  I will try to get in touch with the VA and see what I need to do. I got a letter from the VA out of Phil. PA. and it states she is eligible for the A&A.  I called the 800# and they tell me to go to the local office. Done that as stated in Sept post. They say she is getting the benefit.

I am at the point where Mom will probably need to go in Asst. Living or NH.  Her dementia is getting worse. I have applied for state aid for caregiving help.  I am the only one taking care of her. I am so tired.

[vetadmin]

Goldie,

As the old adage goes, "Until You Walk a Mile".  Acting as a caregiver let alone the single caregiver is exhausting and burnout is more commom that you might suspect.  You might want to check on a support group as a resource for encouragement and a soft place to fall on those days it seems too much.

Keep us posted and good luck!